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| Credit: Creepypasta Wiki. |
Alright, I'm up nice and early (4 AM my time) and ready to start on this monster. Source is the Creepypasta wiki. Not sure who posted it, however, or where it was originally posted. Of course, Copypastas (which Creepypastas are a sub-category for) can be hard to track. Anyway... Let's get started.
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February 23rd, 2011
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Hello. I will be writing on this blog because I am researching a show called Happy Appy.
Well, aren't you special?
One of the main reasons why I'm researching this show is because I've been fascinated with missing TV shows, episodes, and movies. Like most people who research missing episodes, I'm hell-bent on finding London After Midnight, the 108 missing Doctor Who episodes and Him, the 1974 film where a man has a sexual obsession with Jesus.
As you will discover, many of those are far more interesting then the subject manner of this story.
Another reason I want to research this show is because I had an experience with it around 2000.
"A creepy man, in an apple suit, came up to me and touched me... In places..."
It was around 8 in the morning. My younger brother, who was six at the time, was watching a local station in its child TV show block. After a dubbed over Blue's Clues, it started to air a show called Счастливые Яблоко, or Happy Apple.
Because I'm not fluent in... whatever language that is (I'm assuming Russian) I'm going to assume that is just a direct translation and NOT a typo.
I can barely remember the episode, but it was about this apple who was trying to help a kid named Nathaniel. It felt sort of low-budget, but since my brother liked the episode, I didn't mind him watching it. The only thing that made me suspicious was this evil smile that the apple did in the middle of the episode. Despite that I should be helping the search for any video of said missing movies, I'm going to research this one series for now.
I'm sure this series isn't going to consume his life or anything.
Sometime during early 1999, Nickelodeon launched Noggin, a program block that showed TV shows for children. A show on Noggin named Happy Appy, which sounds like a song a babysitter would sing, was first shown within a few weeks of the channel's existence.
The plot of Happy Appy is about a giant clay apple with arms, baby blue eyes, giant dark green lips, and a big green leaf being held up by a rusty bent stick.
In short, it was as low budget as low budget can get. By the way, look at the pic at the top of this post. Does the stick look rusted to you? No? Good luck finding a pic that accurately depicts it like that.
He would go around in a van helping children when they got hurt.
Really? Nothing cliché about that...
As the show's episodes progressed, it just got weirder.
Spoiler alert: weirder = increasingly violent and stupid.
To show one example, Happy Appy kept doing this deranged smile when he was near children.
Drives a van? Check. Deranged smiling? Check. Taking all bets now, child murderer, pedophile, or both!?
It reminded me too much of that smile that he did in the episode I watched. Later in the show's run, they changed Happy's stick to a non-rusty stick, which was still bent.
Which makes him look lamer as opposed to more creepy. To be fair though, that is an aesthetic change I could see a children's show making, so it's alright. While we are talking about this though, how exactly does a stick rust?
The show was one of the shorter shows on the block, at a normal length of 10 minutes long. The episodes were normally played in duets, making each full episode 20 minutes long minus commercials. A couple of months after Happy Appy aired its first episode, Nickelodeon cancelled the show, and it was never shown again on Noggin or Nick Jr. Even the much more appropriate episodes weren't shown for whatever reason.
For "whatever reason" indeed.
However, some parents did record the show, but they were VHS copies.
The magical world of VHSs... And no I don't care if that is the correct plural spelling.
Of those said VHS copies, only a few survived through the years. The tapes were destroyed either due to neglect or disgust, or were simply misplaced and lost for a long time. I was one of the lucky ones that had a copy of the show. Yesterday, when I did some winter cleaning, I found an old DVD with sharpie written on it. It read ‘HA Episodes’, so I did some research on what the HA meant.
"Hawaii 5-0" perhaps? How about hectares? I for one would love to watch a TV show about a measurement.
My first choice was the forum about missing episodes/films that I normally go to.
When I entered the missing episode section of the forum, the first thread I saw was one named "HA? What's this?" It was posted by a woman who had, like me, found a DVD with the initials "HA" on it. As I read the thread more, I found out that the initials on the disc stood for Happy Appy. This instantly reminded me of the weird low-budget show that I watched with my brother in 2000. In the replies, the users claimed that there are no known DVD copies around. I'm not sure how the disc got there, though. I certainly don't remember owning a disc that looked like it!
After viewing the thread, I went ahead and put it into the disk drive, hoping that it would work. Thankfully, the disc did work, and it instantly cut to the intros of the episode, no menus or anything.
How come I doubt that "Thankfully" is the right word?
Happy Appy's intro song had the same tune as Mary Had a Little Lamb. It went something like this.
Happy Appy Appy App,
Happy App, Happy App
Happy Appy Appy App,
He helps kids all day!
Happy Appy Appy App,
Happy App, Happy App
Happy Appy Appy App,
He helps kids all day!
Happy Appy Appy App,
Happy App, Happy App
Happy Appy Appy App,
He helps kids all day!
Man, who ever wrote that was REALLY phoning it in that day.
I just want to point out that if you ever sing the song, the word "kids" is held, meaning that there is no pause between the words. Anyways, that's enough with discussing the intro of the show.
I always thought that there was more to the intro then just the intro song. Guess I was wrong.
Here's what the episodes are about. Episode 1 and 2 were called “Happy's Vacation” and “Hurt Happy”, respectively.
Happy's Vacation was exactly what you’d expect. Happy Appy goes on a vacation to the beach, helps injured kids, and even talks down a bully into not hurting a child.
How do you know that's what I expected? Maybe I thought Appy's ideal vacation was a trip to NYC?
Hurt Happy was about Happy's stick getting broken, and the kids teamed up to help Happy Appy by giving him bandages and fruit.
Yes, give the fruit some fruit to eat! That's sure to help him!!!
Nothing seemed out-of-place when I first saw it, but when I saw it a second time, the episodes looked a little suspicious. When Happy was driving his van to the beach in Happy's Vacation, some frames were skipped. At first, I just ignored it, saying that it could be a scratched DVD. But when I checked the disc, it had no scratches on it whatsoever. Also, during the fruit scene in Hurt Happy, the kids gave him an apple for whatever reason. It could have been a mistake by the producers, though.
I don't see how one makes that kind of mistake, unless their brain just stopped functioning.
Finally, I noticed some things in Hurt Happy that looked out-of-place. In Happy's van, there was what looked like the border of the HOPE poster, but it was so out of frame that it could have been something else. Also, in Happy’s Vacation, the radio plays what sounds like a country cover of "Hot and Cold", which was made in 2008 and very out-of-place for a kid's show. I thought those were just coincidental.
Coincidental? I can get how you may think the HOPE poster might be a coincidence, but a country cover of "Hot and Cold?" Either Katy Perry somehow traveled back in time to take part in this (which is totally possible) or the creators of Happy Appy should be able to sue Katy for plagiarizing their song.
On a side note, is there ANY real reason for this? I have tried to find some reasoning behind "Hot and Cold" being in this story at all, but I have no clue.
Well, I was wrong. Episodes 3 and 4 were stranger. The intros of these two episodes were cut out, but I found out that Episode 4's name was "Nate Needs Help". This struck out to me, because this was the very same episode I saw with my brother, but in English!
Episodes 3 and 4 were missing a few scenes, and, overall, more disturbing than Episodes 1 and 2. On Episode 3, about 5:10 in is when Happy Appy does his first evil smile for 25 seconds.
Nice of you to tell us about Episode 3. No really. Real informative!!!
One moment that could send chills down anyone's spine was the Booboo scene in Nate Needs Help. Happy aids Nate, who has a bruise on his knee. He looks to the camera, giving off the same evil smile that I remember from 2000, and says "What does Nate need for this booboo?” For 30 seconds, he stared at the camera, motionless, with his dark blue soulless eyes locking on to anyone watching. Finally, he broke the silence with "That's right, a bandage!" Why he needed that long to speak, I will never know.
This guy has apparently never watched "Dora the Explorer."
Also, the out of place objects were getting more noticeable. There was a news broadcast about a 9.0 earthquake that recently struck Japan.
I wonder if a kid or another fruit was the anchor.
Happy responded "Oh no! If you want to help the Japanese, call this number!" and a 1-800 number was listed.
February 24th, 2011
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I watched Episode 5, which had a few differences from the first four episodes. First off, it had Happy on his rustless stick. Secondly, this episode got a lot more violent.
Ah, so this is where the pointless violen-... I mean FUN begins.
The episode began with Happy on the playground, but he wasn't playing with the kids, or helping them. He was just staring at them, with that unsettling smile I hate so much.
I'm sure some sicko song was playing in his head too... Probably "Lollipop" by Lil Wayne.
A group of kids are seen playing with jump ropes, when Happy walks over to them.
He calmly tells them something, but I could barely hear what he said. From what I heard, I could only make out "Hello... Happy... I... how... me... please?"
Allow me to try and fill in the blanks... "Hello, I'm your sugar dad- I mean, Happy Appy. I would love it if you sexeh... I MEAN INNOCENT, young children would follow me into the bushes... Please?"
I could see where this was going, as the kids walk with Happy into the bushes of the playground.
I think all of us see where this is going...
Loud violent screams are heard for almost a minute and a half, until Happy is seen dragging three bloody bodies to his van. For the rest of the episode, he does that damn death smile! Why did they use that look so much?
When your budget is only $15, you're going to get the most out of your props.
Episode 6 showed Happy doing his death smile at the beginning, but it was hardly viewable. Around a third of the way in, it went static it for the rest of the show.
I don't believe it...
I couldn't believe it.
I know. How can the creators be that lazy!?
I moved on to Episode 7 and 8. This time, the episodes were so violent and so badly made that they couldn't have been aired on Noggin at all.
Or, you know, they could be the reasons the show got canceled. You never know.
Episode 7 had Happy Appy take a kid into his van. Flesh cutting could be heard, and so could blood splatters on the windows and horrified screams, which turned into gurgles.
"This will teach you to eat my kind!!!!"
Happy emerged, doing a death smile from 09:21 to the end of the show, or 10:00. Like Episode 7, Episode 8 was gory and violent. But this episode, called "The Towers", was so coincidental and violent that I couldn't believe Noggin would even allow it, unless it was some sort of hijacking.
Ah, "hijacking." I see what you did there. Hardy har friggin har har. You are not prepared my friends...
YOU!
ARE!!
NOT!!!
PREPARED!!!!
It starts out with Happy Appy walking around the playground when two kids ask him what the cycle of life is so that they could complete their homework.
That's a bit of an odd homework assignment for elementary school kids. Wonder if any teacher ever summed the lesson up as "Life sucks, and then you die!"
He proceeds to tell the kids about the cycle of life in frogs and plants. The kids said "Thanks, Happy! Can you play with us for a bit?" Happy agrees, and they start playing on the playground. When this happens, smoke starts to creep behind Happy and the children. It gets to a point where they start coughing because of how dense the smoke is, so they turn around to see what was making the smoke. Happy gasps at the sight in front of them.
"MY GOD... IT'S THE TENTH CRICLE OF HELL!!!!"
Two towers were on fire and were burning up.
Sound familiar?
A few people can be seen falling out of windows to escape the fire.
Just in case there is any doubt...
There was a lot of screaming, falling debris, and a crashed airplane in one of the towers.
...Yeah...
Only the tail of the plane was visible, sticking out like a sore thumb and nearing the point of collapse. I could hear a faint whining noise at this point, and I think that it was one of the plane's engines which was probably still on. Seven seconds later, the tail of the plane finally broke apart, with the largest piece of the tail hitting and killing someone. During this scene, fire trucks could be heard trying to douse out the flames, but it only slows the flames down. The wailing of ambulances could also be heard, taking away the bodies of the people who jumped from the towers. It showed a weird guy on fire falling out of one of the towers, screaming.
How nice of you to describe him as weird. Jerkass.
We saw Happy and the kids again, but this time, they stood still in fear. The smoke kept getting thicker and thicker, slowly obscuring the trees and equipment of the playground. The debris from the towers fell around the kids and Happy, and a person ran up to them and told them to run away from the towers before running off. When the older kid worriedly said "Happy Appy, why are the towers on fire?” it cut to a higher-up floor that was near where the plane crashed, which revealed a kid that was crushed under a huge piece of concrete, crying for help. Some other kids tried to help him by lifting the piece of concrete off him. He was screaming so loud, it was almost heartbreaking. There were bodies and blood everywhere, and the pain and fear on the trapped kid’s face was so realistic, I cringed. After the shot with the kid trapped under the concrete, we see the younger kid say “Happy Appy, why are people running and falling from the towers?”
I don't care how young he is, the kid would be able to figure that out.
Happy Appy turns to the camera, death smile on face, and very coldly said three words. Those three words will haunt me as long as I research this show.
"That's natural, children."
He took the two kids away from the towers, leaving the kid stuck under concrete screaming for help. When the credits rolled, the audio of the scene kept playing, and at the end, before it cut out, something collapsed, making a very loud noise that could scare anyone watching.
I jumped out of my seat. Was Happy a death bringer in the form of an apple? Or was he a master predictor? If that episode somehow predicted 9/11, I have to watch Episodes 9 and 10 to see if there was anything else predicted. I might not see any predictions, though, and to be honest, I hope not.
Really, that's just the author admitting he's making this up as he goes along. I know that's not always a bad thing, but still...
Oh, and you want to know what happens when someone calls the tsunami aid phone number?
Not really...
Tomorrow, I’m going to go and call it.
Well, aren't you as special as an actual flea in a flea market?
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Today's Verdict: This seems like a good stopping point. I won't be giving a "Final Verdict" until I reach the conclusion of this story, so I'll just give a verdict on what I read today...
First, allow me to go off on a tangent that is related to a problem this story has already ran into. The story has peaked WAAAAAAYYYYYY too early. You see, I love the idea of a story that gets creepier and a bit more violent as the story goes on, but this story is not that. This story is getting a little bit more creepier (like Eps 5 and 6) and then throwing it right out the window and turning it into a gore fest (like Eps 7 and 8) probably because the author just wanted to get to the hyperviolence and the gore and all that crap. From this point on the episodes become nothing more then attempting to, and failing to, top the last one. When you start saying that a show predicted 9/11, and with such graphic accuracy, you can't top it. Sorry. You lose. End of story. That is really when this story lost me and though it isn't when it starts to get really, really silly (Yes, silly) it is the point where everything just started to sort of go downhill for this installment. As for everything else, the spelling seems to be fine, but the grammar is a bit all over the place here. I'm not a grammar Nazi or anything, as I'm sure many of you can tell, but even I spotted a few glaring mistakes.
Anyway, see you tomorrow for the next installment...
