Before I start, let me say sorry for the long overdue update. I had started on this before I got caught up in all the graduation stuff and preparing for the college life, but I just never got around to finishing this until now due to time limitations. Also, I'm running low on sleep right now, so do not be shocked if my comments start getting really jumbled towards the end, which is where I'm picking up at, and in my final thoughts...
Anyway, I found this on BitBin. The version there is closer to the one that is on the Trollpasta wiki, but it really makes no difference.
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I was a bored kid. Straight-A student with kids always telling me I'm the King.
"They called the toilet in the last stall in the boys room my throne, and would dip my head in it every single day."
It's actually boring, having to catch all the Pokémon with knowing which moves and stuff. When new ones came out, I finished it within a month, catching all the Pokémon with suitable TMs that go with them. So stupidly pointless, I needed a new Pokémon that captured my heart. I hated how with great attacks, weak Pokémon only faint. So, unfair. I've felt this with most, almost every trainer I battled.
This does raise the question about why he kept playing it. Also, going back to the "I needed a new Pokemon that captured my heart." does he want the Pokemon to try and make him fall in love with them. That's a pretty disturbing thought.
This is when I found lost Zangoose. It had unusually big scar across its belly and its claws were bloody too.
It also had no pupils to speak of.
As I tried to "run," the pokémon wouldn't let me so I made it faint. As the next Pokémon appeared it was the same Pokémon. I made it faint countless times."Help me...." the Pokémon cried. I caught it and hurried to the Pokémon center to heal it. I clicked on the profile, the description said that this Pokémon was actually the hidden reason of the fight the Zangoose and Seviper had. That before this Zangoose they were actually in good terms.
You know... that is actually a good reason for the feud between Zangooses and Sevipers. I mean, it didn't say they always hated each other, and if a Zangoose had killed a Seviper, then it would stand to reason the two would start to hate each other...
"What could be wrong?" I questioned myself...
The murderous eye, the bloody claw and the creepy smile... also the reason for a fight? Sounds like I caught an interesting Pokémon. It was never ceased to interest me.
"I would sometimes just stare loveingly at my Gameboy... just wishing that we had a way to be together..."
Its amazing attack and speed despite low level equalled the amount of normal lvl 100 zangoose.
I have to wonder why he didn't catch him sooner then. If it was really a super mega awesome unique looking Marty Stu Pokemon, then I would of caught it as soon as possible instead of pounding the ever living shit out of it.
As I tried to level him up, instead of fainting its enermy it started to kill pokémon"
A Pokepasta with a murdering Pokemon? What a shock!!!
The computer generated "Bird Keeper" is swearing at me for killing it.
Did the Zangoose kill the Bird Keeper, or the Bird Keeper's Pokemon, or did the trainer kill the Zangoose? Clarification please?
A Zangoose that kills Pokémon, one that can cause weak ones to die, intriguing... I was into this game for three whole days just like the time I first played this game, except I wasn't defeating Gym badges and winning Elite Four, I was killing everyone until all trainers and Pokémon had disappeared.
I honestly don't know any other joke to make here except for the one YuriofWind made during his reading of this Pasta: In the king's world, you don't win badges, you fight them and if you defeat the Elite Four, you get a matching set.
I was bored again once I killed them all, and I decided to just play another game until a scary voice scared me from behind
"You done killing people?"
What makes this line funny is that, when you think about it, he did not kill a single person. I mean sure, he killed virtual people, but saying he killed anyway is like saying that everyone who plays GTA "killed people" but I digress...
The Zangoose that kills stood behind me. I was scared, and not because it was my turn to die.
Then you shouldn't be scared... you are either a liar, or really stupid. Also... Pokémon pops out into the real world? Really?
"Now is it my time to die? I don't care; this boring world isn't worth breathing for."
No, it's time to kill the people in this whole world...
This is not a warning message I tell to people that soon the whole world will die, it's not a death threat either...
I can just hear your voices begging me to help me....
Well, I'm glad you can hear me begging you to get mental help...
For the record, a much better ending line would of been the very cliché, but still better then what he put, "It's a promise."
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Final Thoughts: As much as I hate to say it, I honestly don't see how this got deleted from the Creepypasta Wiki. Don't get me wrong, it is low quality, but I have seen worse pastas on that site that never get deleted. Honestly, it's just your stereotypical Pokepasta with poor writing. I will say that it REALLY starts to get bad at the end though, and it is not very believable, which should be what a good Pasta tries to be. It does get some points by having an interesting backstory for the Zangoose, but that is about all I can say was good about it. Well, that and it is short, which is for the best. The only logical way for the story to progress is to explain the killing spree, which would ruin ALL suspension of disbelief.
Final rating: 3/10 Pokémon kings out to kill you.
*sigh* I kind of feel like I'm ripping off you guys by posting this after such a long time off... I promised myself that should I stop posting for a long period of time, I would do an epic return, instead of a whimper... What to do, what to do?
Bah, I'm sure I'll figure something out. In the meantime, I'm going to go and eat some cupcakes...
